December 25th

I hope everyone's Christmas was wonderful! I hope you were able to partake in good times with family and friends, and I hope everyone got what they most wanted and I hope that what everyone wanted was stuff that is actually needed. I also hope you are all able to contemplate what it is you want to accomplish in this new year and that you find yourself well on the path to achieving it!

December 23rd - 24th

I am not sure why it was I decided to do these advent calendar posts. I guess I thought it would be a nifty idea to make little posts every day for all of Christmas. I had wanted to make all of them semi-corny, and in a way, most of them were. However, what I wanted most from these posts was for them to be sincere, and I think I achieved that with all of them. Including this one.

What I want for Christmas: What I want most of all for Christmas is for misunderstandings and bad first impressions to be forgiven. What I want is not for arguments to be made about who was right and who said what, but I just want to be able to move past the animosity of the situation that has been there for too long, and has remained for no real other good reason than that it's been that way. Most of all, I just want to no longer feel like I have to lead two lives. If I could have that for Christmas, I would be happier than if I were to receive any tangible present.

One of you will understand this. The others...well you might. Have a happy and blessed Christmas everyone!

December 20th - 21st
Busy weekend! I imagine the weekend before Christmas always is a busy one, but mine was busy for reasons not related to buying gifts for people. My mom had a holiday party at her house and I came over early to help with getting things prepared. She likened it to a "60's style cocktail party." and there were snacks and drinks galore!

On Sunday, I woke up bright and early to meet up with Jessika and go to our company Christmas party. We had it at the Phoenician, a local five-star resort. The champagne and orange juice flowed copiously! I tried caviar for the first time, and I must confess, it tastes as bad as it sounds. The fish eggs have a juice in them whose flavor I can describe only as 'semi-rancid tuna juice.' But everything else was great and we both had a grand time.

It is nice to have such fun things going on during the holidays!

December 19th

I went to my older sister's graduation party yesterday. It was a small ceremony, but she must have been in a small college of Arizona State University. There were lots of unpronounceable names of graduates of Indian and Southeast Asian descent. My sister was telling how they had to write their names phoenetically on a piece of paper so that the announcer could read the names.

I must admit I was feeling ambivalent that night. I was proud of what my sister accomplished, being 25 and having her bachelor's degree, having just purchased a new home (probably at the best time to buy in 20 years or for the next 20 years) and having a stable, well-paying job with a reputable company. But the self-reflective comparison of the volume of the proverbial glasses showed me that hers was more full than mine. I hope I am able to use this to motivate myself to follow through with what I want to do for an education.

But I remain confident that my decision not to go to college right away was probably the best one for me (even though it was really the only decision.) But for the rest of you out there who have made it, or are very close, I must say that I am glad for you and proud that you have achieved what you have achieved. Congratulations to you!

December 18th

That's right. I skipped the 17th. And if you want to know, I got my presents wrapped on the 17th. But mostly, I felt your friends page deserved a break.

And on the 18th, I hung out with Jessika and watched Home Alone. I don't know what it is about watching the same movies and television shows every Christmas. I have a feeling that the same Charlie Brown special has aired every year since it was made and will continue to air every year until the end of time. Same thing with all those Rankin and Bass claymation specials. Some of them need to be retired permanently, but they never will. But there is one that was made that I wish would be re-aired, even if just for one more Christmas. Y'know the one I'm talking about. That's right, the Star Wars Holiday Special!

Happy Life Day, everyone!

December 16

All the presents I am getting for others are bought! I keep getting asked what it is I want for Christmas, and (aside from Season 11 of the Simpsons), I can't give a straight answer. My situation's not perfect, but right now, I really have everything I need. And what I do need I must get on my own, either due to abstractness or prohibitive costs. I would be perfectly happy with people who aren't sure just saving the money.

To all my friends, I wonder: What is it you want for Christmas this year? Be it an item you need but won't buy, or be it an act or a deed that someone does for you. Or maybe what you want is emotional or spiritual. Regardless, I want to know. What is the gift you most want to get this Christmas?

December 13 & 14

I did most of my Christmas shopping over the weekend. I enjoy my Christmas shopping. I keep it within my means, and I go out with the intent on getting a gift that can be appreciated or used, or in some circumstances, just exactly what the person asked for. I don't think it needs to be overly complicated. Plus I try to remember why it is I do buy people gifts. And if standing in a long line is the worst I have to deal with, I'll gladly take it.

The commercials on TV and the radio are too full of themselves. They play right into the mayhem these companies create; some of them implying that by shopping for Company X, you are able to avoid the hassle and chore that is buying Christmas gifts (or Hanukkah or Yule or what have you...) If your holiday shopping is really that big a deal, then it probably means you're buying too much stuff for others. And if that's the case, check out this site to which roytheboy referred me. It makes a good point about giving; at least a point that really resonated in my mind like a very large bell had just been rung.

I hope all of you are able to find what you want in your search for gifts. And if you find yourself with a couple of extra dollars, consider donating it to whatever cause you feel needs it the most. Because giving is more than just buying things for your family and friends. At least, I hope it is...

December 12

I decided on Friday that I would like to plan another Dallas (and Vicinity) trip! So this means that I will asking to be freeloading, needing floors on which to sleep, and complaining that I didn't have enough time to do everything and hang out with everyone I wanted to. But I'd like that last one to be slightly different in that I hope to stay longer than a week.

I am aiming either for the summer or winter, due to school. We shall see! I do always enjoy spending time with friends, even if it is just for a little while...

December 11

It is "cold" in Arizona. It doesn't really get that cold in the Phoenix area for obvious reasons of being so retardedly hot the rest of the year. So far in the mornings, the coldest it's been has been around 45. I like it when it is cool out and not just because it's so damn hot the rest of the year. I expect it to get a tad cooler as the winter wears on, probably getting the coolest in January. And then it will warm up again. I will enjoy the cool season while it lasts!

I liked how, in Dallas, it would snow once or maybe twice in winter and then be done. All the fun of a snow day without having to endure months of waking up early to scrape ice off windshields!

December 10th

Egg nog. How is it made from eggs? Isn't there something about drinking raw eggs that is possibly unsanitary? Even if it IS just the whites? Can you pour egg nog into a hot skillet and make nog-omelets (Or as I call them, 'nogelets'?) And why isn't egg nog available all year? Is it that the hens don't lay nog-worthy eggs during the rest of the year? Surely there is some specialty dairy store that stocks nog all the year round. And what of other forms of nog? Where is the carrot nog, the beef tallow nog and the spicy chipotle nog? And if egg nog is so associated with Christmas, why don't we leave it instead of plain moo-cow fuck milk out for Santa on Christmas Eve?

Irrespective of source or destination, egg nog is still a grand conveyance to Christmas!

December 9th

As of yesterday, December 9th, all of my Christmas cards were sent out to their respective receipients. I'm not exactly sure what motivated me to send out that first batch in 2005, but this ritual has become one of the things I look forward to in the holiday season. Everything, from designing them to getting them printed up (and visiting with my former Walgreens coworkers) to sending them out and thinking up semi-clever or otherwise innocuous phrases to write on them is a joy in itself. I guess mainly I am glad to have people in my life enough that I CAN send them cards. If I could change anything about that, it would be that I wish that the contact was more than just a Christmas card and occasional LJ or Facebook backs-and-forths.

I had 40 made up this year. I didn't think I'd give them all away, but I only have one left. And that one is for my mother. If you're reading this and didn't get a card, you have no one to blame but yourself. Or the incompetent mailman. I kid, of course. But if you didn't get one, it was because I don't have you address. Send your real, physical address to me and I will be sure you get one next year. Assuming I can still get them printed up...

December 8th

Goals and tasks to achieve can seem overwhelming when you look at the whole thing. "How am I going to find a new job", for example. But if you take the goal and declare that it is actually the end result of a series of smaller tasks, it suddenly becomes less fearsome and impossible to achieve. "I need to gather a resume. I need to make some phone calls. I need to go on some interviews. I need to call back." It seems like the same object is less imposing.

And this is what I've decided for life. No one knows what we are supposed to do here. Oh, yeah, people claim to know all the time, but they are at best a rough guess. So instead of sulking about what it is I am to do with my life, I have decided that God or whatever controlling forces of this universe will get me there when I am ready. But in the mean time, I should break things into smaller, shorter-term goals. This is my main reason for going back to school next spring and working on my associates in electronic engineering. I know I won't be doing the electronic thing forever, but it will help me in the 5-10 year range to have that degree and education.

Yesterday, I was able to go to the campus I will be attending. I didn't get all of my questions answered in this one trip, but I did get my residency status updated and I have a meeting with an academic counselor on Wednesday. I am hoping that most or all of my concerns about the appropriateness of my degree program and questions about online classes can be answered. I am feeling good and confident about it, and it is nice to have an end result to work for now, even if it is a just a short chapter.

To everyone reading this: May your goals be clear and may the path to achieve them be laid out and not obscured. I hope whatever it is you're aiming to achieve will come your way.

December 3rd

Jessika came over to my apartment last night. She helped me to do my grocery shopping and, when we got home, tried something neither of us ever tried: an apple pear. An apple pear, as far as I can tell, is a hybrid between the two and it sure seemed like it. It could also have been just a pear with very apple-like qualities. Either way, it was oddly delicious.

We had pumpkin egg nog and watched That 70's Show on DVD. And then went to sleep. I like knowing that I can enjoy doing those seemingly mundane, simple things with my girlfriend.

December 2nd

My eldest sister, Amanda came to visit me last night. She had just gotten off work and called me up, offering to go to Chipotle and buy me dinner in exchange for buying her lunch the other day at Waffle House. I was telling her the extras I like to get on Chipotle burritos which were, coincidentally the same as the extras on hers.

She arrived at my apartment about 30 minutes later and we ate our burritos and watched The Simpsons. We only watched one episode, as she had to leave to go to sleep. After she left, I reflected on how great my family is to one another, even if we don't always see eye to eye on some things. Of course, I imagine all families are like that. Regardless, I am grateful to have them in my life.